And now, more waiting

Today was the sonohistogram and biopsy. And just for fun, a pap smear was thrown in because, you know, when you have an audience of four (RE, RE fellow aka Dr. No Face, med student, Nurse Smiley) for cooter show you might as well make it extra interesting. The RE was the Dr. we met with last August for our infertility consult. At that appointment, I found him to be dismissive, patronizing and arrogant so I wasn’t looking forward to seeing him again. Today, he seemed warmer and gentler. Don’t know which is the real him, so he will be Dr. Schizo for now.

The sonohistogram showed no abnormalities in the uterus as expected since my HSG in October showed the uterus looked ok but Dr. Schizo thought he saw some debris in there. Eh, sorry, but you know Doc, I hate to litter, so when there’s no trash can around… He said this was probably due to the saline being injected in there and stirring things up. He said that it would get cleared out by my next period. The ultrasound still showed the weird spot on my cervix. Dr. Schizo thought it could be glandular in nature, like some extra glandular (innocuous) mass I was born with. But they took a biopsy of it anyway just to be sure it wasn’t precancerous. Why they never saw the cervical weirdness the multiple times they’ve wanded me before, I don’t know. And Dr. Schizo also said he’d never seen anything like it before. Umm, how can you be sure it’s innocuous then?! But, again, I have nothing tangible to consult Dr. Google with and therefore nothing to seed my fears with.

So I will just wait to hear about the biopsy results and go on like I’m not the walking I-have-never-heard/seen-something-like-that-before* freak that I am.

If every thing comes back ok, then the plan will probably be to try the Clomid/IUI once my next period starts. The only problem is that I am expecting my next period to be about a week before my annual meeting with my committee members. The timing will be such that we could be doing or leading up to the IUI around the time of my committee meeting if I am again lucky enough not to have any day 3 cysts. I’m not sure I want all that pressure, especially since I really want this to be my pre-defense meeting (i.e. my committee members tell me I should wrap up my graduate work in the next few months and graduate). My head tells me the smart thing to do is to postpone the cycle until after my committee meeting. My heart says you’ve waited long enough and you still have no answers as to if your eggs are going to respond at all so just go for the gold. I don’t know what I’m going to do. It’s going to be a difficult decision.

*This is a comment I have heard a lot of the last two years. When my miscarriage consisted of being bone dry for the whole day, then gushing blood starting at 9pm and ending at 10pm for two days (really, I could have synchronized the watches of everyone on the West Coast by when the blood gushing started and when it stopped). When my hcg levels took almost two months to drop to below 100, then plateaued at around 70 for two weeks. And when I tell doctors about my early ovulation.